A Court of Thorns and Roses

At the very least, I can say that I finished reading it, which is more than I can say for Throne of Glass. Unfortunately, it's one of those books that I'll forget in a week. Big yawn. There isn't an ounce of originality to be found here. Nothing new, nothing that hasn't been done a million time.

Protagonist: You know her. It's that girl that singlehandedly takes care of her family of deadbeats. She's got both the absentee parent and the dead mom trope going for her. She is, apparently, the only one who cares about surviving. She is an artist. She is the one who talks back to her captors/authority figures and never suffers the consequences (This is what being a badass is all about in YA novels). She is sarcasm reborn but only because she's never known true love (* much sadness). She's the special snowflake that's got all the boys in the yard thinking she's farting rainbows. Yeah, you know her. Setting: Ye olde medieval England *with fairies. These people eat the same things we do, dress the same, drink tea and wine, hunt the same wildlife (deer and wolves). The flowers are the same. The fairies are the same that you've seen in every supernatural fantasy out there (puca, nagas....). Utterly generic worldbuidling.

Plot: beauty and the beast retelling without the conflict of the original beauty and the beast. The beast is gorgeous and kind. Feyre's not a prisoner of the castle, she can actually leave. Her family is well taken care off (not dying, or struggling, or frantically looking for her). There is absolutely NO meaningful conflict in this story until they get to Under the Mountain (you know it's a bad place because of the capitalization!). Even at the end, every “plot twist” is as straight as an arrow. What you do get until then, however, is a hefty dose of fake angst. It goes like this:

Feyre: I need to leave!
Tamlin: Why?
F: I need to care for my family. I made a promise.
T: They're living in luxury as we speak. You're keeping your word right now by staying.
F: I need to leave!
T: Why?
F: Because! Reasons!
(repeat ad nauseam)

And the ever popular:
Tamlin or Lucien: Feyre, don't go there, you'll die!
Feyre: But!
Goes anywaysBloodshed ensues
Tamlin: I told you not to go there!
(repeat ad nauseam)

Romance: as bland as the love interest. Tamlin is your typical romantic lead, all snarls, strong jaw, and gleaming eyes. I totally forgot his hair color because it doesn't matter. He's the typical one dimensional, only defined by his hawtness, male lead designed to appeal to a very broad audience. Also, he's white. Wouldn't want to shock anyone with an interracial romance (and no, fae vs human doesn't count). You'd think he'd have a few more issues considering what he had to do to find the curse breaker. But no, not our super bland Tamlin. Can't make him too dark, too flawed. The sex scenes are awkward and don't add anything.

Antagonist: She's a woman so obviously she's a sex addict and wants to get into the love interest's pantaloons. Because that's what female villains are all about.

Writing: I don't know...how to describe the words on the page – word on the page - writing...writing? Writing!
Ellipses and hyphens FTW!

On the plus side, reading this book won't kill too many brain cells. It's just a massive bore. But if you're looking for any plot twists, world building, anything at all that is new, look elsewhere.