PERfunctory AfFECTION

Brought on by the death of her mother, Meg has been suffering from severe anxiety for years. Every day is a living hell as she fights her way through panic attacks and irrational fears. All Meg wants is to be a normal person again. To be able to be around people without worrying about when her anxiety will throw her into a panic attack and make her run home. When Meg's therapist, Dr. Jillian, suggests an experimental drug called Fitrecepon, Meg jumps at the chance and begins taking them. While it isn't immediate relief, Meg slowly starts to handle day to day life easier. Until she meets Haley, a guest teacher at the university. Suddenly it's as if life is ready and waiting for Meg, as Haley pulls her into a whirlwind of activity she would never have been able to achieve on her own. But are things too good to be true? A man lurks in the shadows, watching Meg, warning her that Haley isn't what she seems. Is Haley the friend Meg needs to pull her free of her crippling anxiety, or is it an illusion?

The way Kim Harrison paints Meg's anxiety is spot on to what I know my anxiety to be like. A few reviews I have read spoke about the confusing beginning and how they didn't know what was going on. Welcome to the life of someone suffering from anxiety. Your thoughts race, irrational fears, and questions begin to pop up out of nowhere and you suddenly find yourself unable to do anything but breathe. Meg does all she can to just walk out of the house to meet a few friends. Hell, there have been times I've been so crippled up I can't even accomplish that.

There is a good deal of blurring reality with illusion in this novel. The reader is never sure if what Meg is seeing is real, or just a side effect of her new medication. This does allow the fantasy elements to come into play as hints are dropped at whether or not there are fey involved. Having read the novel I can't honestly tell you if they are real or not. It makes me want to read it one more time and pick apart everything to make a more informed decision on the matter.

I do wish there had been a bit more build up with some characters. Aside from Meg, you don't learn much about anyone else. I think seeing the other characters on the page more would have added to the twist Kim threw towards the end. Dr. Jillian was the therapist, only seen during therapy. Haley was the friend only seen when shopping and going out to dinner. It was a very closed minded approach compared to her other novels where she flushed out each and every character over time.

As much as I love The Hollows series, I enjoyed seeing Kim Harrison experiment with a different type of writing. While this book is intended for adults, I can easily see young adults enjoying it as well.

Meg has suffered from depression since her mother's death. Add the guilt of hurting her boyfriend when she intentionally drove into a tree, and you have a pretty troubled young woman. Her doctor is going to let her try a new and experimental drug to help with her treatment.

I really wanted to love this book. I love The Hollows series, it is one of my all time favorites. Sadly, this one was not for me. I don't really think it should be classified as fantasy. I'm not sure what category I would put it in. I just know that I did not enjoy it.

I received a copy from Net Galley. All thoughts and opinions are my own.