A Little Life

This book's a real tearjerker! As other reviewers said though, in parts it might feel forced. I don't mind heavy subject matters, but this would have gotten 5 stars from me only if some of the heaviness was better balanced. E.g. maybe some of Jude's heavy struggles could've been replaced with another character's POV having more defined ups and downs.

I get that the point is to emphasise how isolated Jude feels with his big problems compared to his friends' 'normal' problems, but that concept didn't need to be taken to the extremes that it was. After a point it really was numbing and just piling on struggles didn't add to the emotional impact anymore.

“Life is so sad. It's so sad, and yet we'll do it. We all cling to it; we all search for something to give us solace.”

4.5 I think???? Maybe.

Non-spoilers: The writing of this book is beautiful, but it has some parts that seemed unnecessary to elongate the story where it didn't really have to. Once knowing the focus characters and incidents, it's easy to skim over parts that didn't connect too much to the story. The synopsis of the book threw me off, as it is true, but the centerpiece of the story is slightly off from it, particularly regarding the friends. I was more frustrated and angry with many of the parts of the story, shocking images of all that's happened.

Spoilers: I was so angry at Jude throughout the entire book because he refused therapy, the idea of "I deserve this", and rejection of help for the majority of the book. But now with the ending, I'm not sure what to feel. How do you even feel after that? All the anger poofed after Willem's death; the most impacting moment for me was when Jude imagined himself with Willem's arms around him, the sandalwood scent on his clothes that eventually faded, desperately trying to conserve and save it in the closet. Can I think about sandalwood the same way before I read the book? Probably not. I feel that pretty much everything in this book is all unfortunate things that happen in life. It's so sad, yet we do it. It's so painful, yet we resort to dark thoughts and pain. Can we help people? Yeah. Can we try to fix someone? As much as we want to, people won't accept, won't see how much you care, won't give in. And that's reality sometimes.Edit: After some discussion in the BLC, it's understandable that Jude didn't want to accept therapy because he didn't want to expose himself and relive everything of the past. It seemed easier just to keep it in. It's still just heartbreaking that nothing would, will, and can heal someone like Jude.

things i liked:
1. beautifully written
2. good representation

things i didn't like:
1. so much shit happened in Jude's childhood, maybe a little too much, made me a bit numb
2. plateaued a little in the middle of the book. while i understand it's meant to be more detail-oriented, it needed a little bit of more momentum from the story line.
3. i just wish Jude was a little bit less self-pitying
4. it felt a little feminine, maybe because it was written by a female author. she didn't understand the male psyche well enough (in my personal opinion)