Dear Tabby

A letter from Stanky Skunque: “Dear Tabby, I've been lonely for so long. Something about the white stripes down my back puts everyone off. It's sort of hard to meet girls when they're screaming and running away from you. Should I just give up? Love, Stanky

Dear Stanky (ever thought about changing your name, by the way?), Be patient, my fragrant friend! For every saltshaker there's a pepper mill, for every cup there's a saucer, and for every ham there's a cheese. I know that somewhere there's a gal with the good scents—er, sense—to see the beauty of your inner, stripeless self. In the meantime, try some cologne. Purrfectly yours, Tabby D. Cat”

Tabby D. Cat is an advice columnist who helps animals of all shapes and sizes cope with the problems that occur in their lives, with wit and useful suggestions.