Girl on Trial
Thank you BookSirens (and Kathleen Fine!) for allowing me to read this ARC!
What an introduction! We are immediately plunged into the aftermath of the crime, which we aren't aware of at this point in the novel, with a simple but very impactful scene. This author writes addiction with much empathy, which I gathered from the prologue alone. The grief, coping, and guilt of this main character matters more than anything and this was displayed well throughout the book.
As someone with a shorter attention span, I really appreciated the shorter length chapters. I did feel the book was dragging on at times though. What our main character had for breakfast is not necessarily the most important aspect of a scene, but it was given so much time. 40% of the way through and I felt like we were barely getting to tension. The constant switching between past and present, while it does provide context, gives me a bit of whiplash. I couldn't get attached to emotional moments at first. Ultimately, as soon as we get any momentum, the chapter ends (in the first half of the book). The conflict FLIES by and becomes just underwhelming. At the same time, the book itself was going rather slow and gave us too much time to connect dots and to make up our own conclusions. I found myself guessing the plot twist early on in the book.
I will also say that there were SO many characters and some of them weren't distinct enough to remember quickly. Most of the names were so generic sounding and ran together. By the end of the book, I would still mix up certain names.
Despite these things, there was a great mix of physical/enviroment detail and internal thoughts. In other words, characterization was both physical and mental. Emily is a great example of a victim that isn't “perfect”, as most people aren't. We often can't stomach that people who've suffered greatly are not perfect people and that's why I appreciated this kind of characterization. She made bad decisions, but ultimately, was driven to these behaviors by her own grief and turmoil.
Once we got through a bunch of exposition and context, the story truly engaged me. As there were more bumps in the road for Emily (ie. more tension and conflict), the back and forth was not as whiplash-y and left me on the edge of my seat. The twists and turns of the story, while sometimes expected, were very impactful. Sometimes the things we expect from traumatic events like this are just realistic, not cliche! I applaud the author for handling certain sensitive subjects with such care. It's very refreshing to see this being discussed with sensitivity, as a lot of popular books dealing with similar issues tend to romanticize it.
Ultimately, this type of fiction is new for me. I am often reading Adult Fiction, but I wanted to try something new. I am pleasantly surprised at what this book is exploring thematically. The plot is incredibly interesting and I was extremely compelled by Emily's character. This novel made me consider my own morals and judgements, as well as my privileges. I found myself trying to figure out how I might feel if I was her, if I was a juror, and what fate Emily might ‘deserve'. In the end though, I think this story is much more than giving or not giving a conviction to a young girl. It's about abuse, trauma, and grief. How Emily copes, how she attempts to reconcile with and forgive herself, and how everything went down, is at the center of this story. While I had difficultly with pacing and some of the characters fell flat for me, the story's message makes up for that. The end wasn't terribly satisfying for me, but I think that's what life is. You survive even when it's not pretty, even when you'd rather move on and forget your past life.