My Beloved Monster

Serious TW: Author recalls the cats he owned/lived with before Masha. Almost all of them died violently, or disappeared and were presumed dead. There is a graphic description of the carnage that took place when a mom cat's kittens were torn apart by a dog that got into the house (I almost noped out then and there). Frankly, Masha's death is one of the least upsetting ones, as she was humanely put to sleep when her pain was too strong to sustain any quality of life. This is NOT your standard feel-good pet memoir like [b:Marley and Me: Life and Love With the World's Worst Dog 12691 Marley and Me Life and Love With the World's Worst Dog John Grogan https://i.gr-assets.com/images/S/compressed.photo.goodreads.com/books/1308858322l/12691.SY75.jpg 14961] or [b:Dewey: The Small-Town Library Cat Who Touched the World 3257136 Dewey The Small-Town Library Cat Who Touched the World Vicki Myron https://i.gr-assets.com/images/S/compressed.photo.goodreads.com/books/1398144610l/3257136.SY75.jpg 3292360]. Caleb Carr wrote dark, disturbing thrillers (including the bestselling [b:The Alienist 40024 The Alienist (Dr. Laszlo Kreizler, #1) Caleb Carr https://i.gr-assets.com/images/S/compressed.photo.goodreads.com/books/1388256626l/40024.SY75.jpg 2266643]) that reflected his own damaged psyche resulting from a traumatic childhood. His “rescuer” Masha, a Siberian Forest Cat, was abused and then abandoned in an empty, locked apartment by her former owner. So their almost mystically strong bond arose from the parallel crises they had endured separately, and continued to experience together. For every heartwarming example of the ways Masha displayed her love and protectiveness, Caleb invokes another flashback to his relationships with previous cats, many of whom died violently. Or he describes one of many life-threatening medical emergencies that man and feline experienced. During their 17 years together, Carr insisted he and Masha had an unspoken, shared pact to stay alive for each other, and Carr's unceasing love and attention must surely have contributed to Masha's recovery from some pretty scary injuries.* Carr mentions scientific research about cat behavior occasionally, but many of his conclusions about the rationale for Masha's behavior are based on his childhood certainty that he was half man and half cat. As with most beloved animal memoirs, My Beloved Monster culminates with Masha's eventual decline and passing. Carr died of cancer two years later, just as this book was being published. I have no problem believing that Carr refused to let go until he knew Masha's story would be told. I hope that they found each other in the hereafter and are roaming side by side, pain-free and safe from any dangers.*There are numerous one-star GR reviews of this book that excoriate Carr for allowing Masha to be an outdoor cat, and indeed many of her injuries resulted from confrontations with wild predators. Carr had his reasons for giving her that freedom. You may or may not agree with his decision, but if you base your entire review on that one issue, maybe you should just move on to the next book in your TBR list.