No Thanks

For essays about rejecting motherhood and Christianity and about living abroad, this collection was surprisingly unresonating. There's an unnecessary and specific march of ‘this is what tools of the patriarchy would say'. Keturah confronts cultural confines except for those that work for her, with a blind spot for capitalist values. The worth of other humans in her life are weighed up transactionally. You're out of the running if you hold the wrong passport. And she takes a general jab at ‘overweight and homely' women as more obviously having nothing to offer beyond a green card.

‘What the Wound Reveals' was the most personally evocative in addressing the acceptance of mediocre friendships when you're young, inexperienced and/or out of your element.

She refers to Black atheist and secular humanist groups and shares conversations with friends, scholars, and community leaders that some readers may find a support.

Loved everything about it – except, sigh, the implementation.

Chapter One captivated me: wow and wow, there was so much YES in each page! So many of the important foundations of a good life, all of which are so hard to discover in this culture: you do not need to conform to your parents' expectations; do not need to “stay close to family” in order to serve them. You do not need to marry, do not need to breed, do not need to worship violent and petulant hate-filled (also nonexistent) sky-gods. Learning to question, think, and say No is the most respectful and self-loving act you can take; it is more likely to lead to a fulfilling life than if you quietly follow social norms. I was all set to buy copies for all my young relatives.

Then I found myself struggling. Little things at first, rereading paragraphs or going back a page because it was taking me a while to understand the context. I shrugged and blamed myself. Then more and more impenetrable sentences, baffling metaphors, or missed segues. Occasionally instances where, upon spending much effort, I'd realize “oh, this is an editing error, I bet she means this other word.” After enough of those, and the final chapter which is entirely about TV shows and is completely incomprehensible to someone with no TV, I stopped blaming myself. I regretfully conclude that Kendrick is an amazing person, wise and kind and with much to say, but her way of writing does not work for me, and it's entirely my loss.