Pride and Prejudice and Mistletoe by Melissa de la Cruz

Darcy Fitzwilliam is 29, beautiful, successful, and brilliant. She dates hedge funders and basketball stars and is never without her three cellphones-one for work, one for play, and one to throw at her assistant. Darcy's never fallen in love, never has time for anyone else's drama, and never goes home for Christmas if she can help it. But when her mother falls ill, she comes home to Pemberley, Ohio, to spend the season with her family. Her parents throw their annual Christmas bash, where she meets one Luke Bennet, the smart, sardonic slacker son of their neighbor. Luke is 32-years-old and has never left home. He's a carpenter and makes beautiful furniture, and is content with his simple life. He comes from a family of five brothers, each one less ambitious than the other. When Darcy and Luke fall into bed after too many eggnogs, Darcy thinks it's just another one night stand. But why can't she stop thinking of Luke? What is it about him? And can she fall in love, or will her pride and his prejudice against big-city girls stand in their way?

Oh, dear. This was not good. I can deal with cheesy, and I liked the idea of gender-swapping the lead characters in this modern-day Pride and Prejudice reimagining. But the writing was just so bad. Everything felt frantic (I like you, I don't like you, I'm marrying someone else, I called off the wedding, me too, I love you, wait I'm not sure, OK yeah I love you -- all in about two weeks!), Luke was not really like Elizabeth Bennet at all, and Darcy was not believable as a super successful business person. I really want to love Austen retellings, but there are a lot of bad ones out there, and this is one of them.

I loved the blurb for this book, and almost ordered it instantly...but I decided to be good and wait, and then I saw it at my library! Of course I picked it up...and I was shocked by how small it was. “How does anyone fit a retelling of P&P in a book this size?” I thought...but I gave it a try anyway. The answer is...eh...they don't. Or at least not very well. Seriously...where's the rest of it?Yes, it read just as rushed as I expected. The characters are flat and not very interesting. Darcy (female type here, remember) is done better than any of the rest. Even Luke, her “Lizzy,” who is supposed to be this amazing artisan who creates fantastic wood furniture...which is mentioned like twice...and then forgotten all about. At the end he even randomly picks up a new career (WTF?). The writing is boring. The adults feel like teenagers. The plot of P&P is condensed from well over a year down to less than 2 weeks. Uggggh.However, I did really like the Darcy/Bingley combination going on here. I loved that they totally stepped outside the expected m/f relationships there. Bingley was just adorable (if somewhat stereotypical in his own way). He is what saves this from being a 2-star read. If you know P&P, there are no surprises here. Which is fine! However, I felt like the stakes were not as high as in the original, or even as in a better retelling - which, by the way, would be [b:Eligible 25852870 Eligible (The Austen Project, #4) Curtis Sittenfeld https://images.gr-assets.com/books/1460477855s/25852870.jpg 26428236] by Curtis Sittenfeld - and besides all the lackluster writing, that just made it very bland and overall disappointing. Blog Twitter Bloglovin Instagram Google+

The FMC is insufferable, but that's a plot point and if you can get past that and the fact that Melissa de la Cruz doesn't know anything about Ohio, it's not bad.