Real Sex: The Naked Truth about Chastity

This is still the best, most thoughtful book on sex and chastity I've ever read. I know there are more theological books, and more recent books, but this has just the right balance of theology, pastoral wisdom, winsomeness, groundedness to really speak to sexuality in the church in this day and age (when if some of the cultural references and language is a bit dated now).

At times Winner says things a little more starkly than I would, it should definitely speaks very much more conservative place. But this is hands down the best articulation and defense of the traditional Christian sexual ethic you will find, and I would wholeheartedly endorse this book to anyone who wants more clarity on what the church teaches about this topic and why. I would especially recommend this to high school and college students.

My only hesitation in recommending this book now would be my lack of clarity on how Winner currently views what she wrote in this book. She finished this book right after getting married, and some really beautiful parts of the book are about her transition from being single to being married. However, the handful of years after this book, she divorced that guy and experienced a real season of doubt in her faith, which she writes about in her beautiful memoir, “Still”. And I mentioned this not to judge her or say that her words here no longer hold weight. Not at all. I'm only making a pastoral point. I simply don't know if she herself would still endorse most or all she wrote in this book, and therefore there is some hesitancy there. If somebody read this book, was incredibly helped by it, and really had their opinions changed in these matters, and then found out that she rejects most of the book, what would that do?

Lastly, for anyone interested in this book, she covers the traditional Christian sexual ethic around sex, chastity, and a theology of singleness and marriage. At no point in the book does she speak to LGBTQ issues one way or another. This book could fully be read and appreciated by all Christians whether they are LGBTQ affirming or not. I see no reason that someone's conscience would be especially bothered either way from this book.