ray

reading this in the plane is a crazy experience. felt like i was experiencing a solenoid somewhat, with the vibrations around me. the prose itself has a nauseating quality to it that was perfect for the situation of being on a plane. very evocative use of imagery and metaphors– the literary canon as doors on the wall, the discarded braids as hopes unfulfilled. lice and mites which depend on us flipped into us depending on another. i really love how rooted in bucharest the book is, despite the vague city locations and qualities. i wish it were more like ulysses in that regard, where you can trace the events directly on a map. but it may have to be a different book at that point. i really love the higher dimensionality parts– they're a really neat concept that i love seeing explored in fiction, where math crosses over into pop culture (e.g. three body problem). i also love the whole alternate timelines situation, especially how they handled parallel universes. in some ways i've also had this experience of imagining a different life that branched off from one event, and in grieving that path i'm able to come to terms with what hasn't come to pass. i'm knocking a message on the wall for the other. and i want to believe and be receptive to the other paths which might be knocking a message for me. i wish the ending was resolved in a more abstract manner, but i see where everything needed to be taken in. it's a very haunting and engaging read that's very suspenseful.

liked it! there's this distinct point in the book where gina is forced to grow up, bildungsroman style, and the prideful parts of her turning into courage and bravery is really touching to see. szabó is fantastic at writing suspense and drama, particularly capturing the indirect aggression from being ostracized, the type that's only told in what isn't being said. the ending is still really satisfying even though it doesn't come as a surprise. it's written with a clarity about the characters' emotional states that's very sensitive and makes sense with the narration (as almost a memoir style of storytelling) so i didn't find myself turned off by that. i think it's incredibly optimistic even in the face of fascism, as a reminder of the lives that can be saved from individual actions, unnoticed in the greater tragedy of war. there is resistance and hope... and the way that it's shown through the actions of a teenage girl is really refreshing.

>Be strong, she seemed to hear a voice telling her from that unknown place–possibly from outside the country. Be strong, my dearest love in all the world. Be strong, so that I too will have the strength for what I must do.

WOAH? I read The Feminist when it was published way back and I didn't realize that this book would be a collection of different actors from that initial short story. What I really admire is the way Tony Tulathimutte is able to capture the multitude of voices in what it means to be “chronically online” from specific typing quirks of women on the gen-z/millennial cusp (in Pics) to the brazen self-righteousness of tech startup dudebros (in Our Dope Future). It's so fun to read.

The thread of rejection follows each of these characters, and it's interesting to see how the element of each character's self-rejection builds up to rejection from others and eventually their own rejection of society. Each character's rejection of themselves is buffered by building up a wall of superiority, and the rejection by others flips that on its head into an inferiority crisis. Their resentment brews into a cataclysmal eruption. What I found so very intriguing was how the stories were interwoven, especially between The Feminist, Pics, and Main Character, where the main character shows up as background characters in the others' points of view, and the main character has no idea the others have shared the same crises as they have. The isolating nature of one's experiences.

It's not even always about social media per se, but the build-up of the American millennial experience shaped by identity politics is so captivating to read. There's this very specific element of wry irony and self-deprecating humour throughout all the pieces that's so recognizable from my own online experiences. A time capsule to certain fringes of the internet. It makes me excited for what's to come from Tulathimutte next and future writers' explorations of communication and relationships in the online era.

If discourse is loneliness, as they wrote, then they have made this loneliness bespoke: each is for you and nobody else.

YES!!!!!!!!! an absolute blast. it's thorough and revealing of how randomized controlled trials are so important to understanding whether a treatment works or not, and the various roadblocks in getting ineffective treatments reversed. it's only been what, 30 years(????) since the use of RCTs in medicine became the norm– from my courses it feels like it's been this way forever... it makes compelling arguments for reforms in med school education. i really really like how they emphasize that RCTs can still be manipulated. what stood out to me was the use of surrogate end points that don't matter in impacting the things we actually care about (e.g. drug decreases the size of tumors but doesn't actually impact mortality). it shows how logic from a reductionist perspective/understanding of illness can lead us astray (e.g. tumors are bad so decreasing tumors should help patients, but it doesn't). so fascinating that as humans we strive for improvement and action and things we can do– at the same time the book is conscious of how it's mostly written from a US perspective, so i wonder what the financial incentives for trials etc look like outside of the country. i really like this book... this book is a good model for how one can be critical of their research field in a constructive way.

i lovee you alison bechdel. in imagery and in prose and in both at the same time. i love catching a glimpse into how others experience books, especially with authors that i've encountered, like virginia woolf. i also adore how she openly depicts the process of creating the graphic novel in her own graphic novel, of hanging onto her mom's every word, of drawing herself drawing her own dreams. I LOVE YOU ALISON BECHDEL! now im off to make dumplings