kat 🍓

5:

Why were Olaf and his gang of evildoers so hilarious in this book??? This one's made me laugh the hardest in the series.

I didn't like Fernand at ALL!!! Also Sunny almost DIED!!! Again!!!

So close to the end now, I don't wanna say goodbye but I also really need for this to turn out good for the kids.

4:

The sneaky critters ATE a baby's FACE in like the first chapter!!!!!!! Wowee!!!

Honestly I loved this book so much. It has the downside of Jeff Goldblum not being on it, but to make up for that, it keeps you on your toes, and provides gratuitous violence, along with a wicked sense satisfaction once the billionaire becomes supper.

4.5:

INCREDIBLY DEADLY VIPER, NOOO :(

Gee, is there not a single adult in the Baudelaire children's life who isn't either a repugnant jerk, abysmally incompetent and full of themselves, or dead? Why is Mr. Poe in charge, what an irritating little man. But he did deliver the absolute best quote in the whole book:

“Good God! Blessed Allah! Zeus and Hera! Mary and Joseph! Nathaniel Hawthorne!”

This was good! Olaf was nasty Monty was pretty decent! And there was that Herpetological Society dickwad who was rude and dismissive for no reason. Bad, bad, bad. Fuck you, Bruce.

I'm extremely upset at the ambiguous fate given to all the animals, I just can't get over it. WHAT do you mean they might just be put down? I'm heartbroken.

Once again I'm choosing to ignore Lemony Snicket's warnings about this story not going anywhere nice because I'm having so much fun with it. A literal murder takes place in this book, but somehow it's way more hilarious than the first one? Hang in there, Baudelaires!

4:

Phenomenal. I purposely spent long periods of time between chapters because I wanted to make my time with the story last as much as possible, which surprised me because this is a 750 page brick. I do admit that there were moments where the story dragged on a bit (I didn't particularly care for the Samantha storyline), but many parts of it I loved, and to me it... mostly made up for that. There was SO much going on but it was all nicely tied up at the end.

(I admit almost quit it right at the beginning, what with the whole man-eating-vagina deal. It was bizarre. But hey, I won't yuck your yums, Neil)