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All Is Not LOST is the sad, funny, self-effacing yet soul-bearing story of what happened when one woman set aside a lifelong dream in favor of her kids, only to find herself battling her own ego and unfulfilled ambition. This is the memoir of former working actress Shannon Kenny Carbonell, and her own bittersweet account of the journey she undertook to reconcile her growing feelings of failure and the sudden loss of her identity. Shannon—wife of actor Nestor Carbonell of LOST, Bates Motel, and The Morning Show fame— knew she was making the better choice for her, no matter how painful, when she decided on full-time motherhood over her career. But little did she know that shortly after her family moved to Oahu, Hawaii, while Nestor shot LOST, Shannon would find herself desperate to feed the part of her that was suddenly starved of creativity and accomplishment. Just like the LOST survivors, she had crashed on an island that would test her, heal her, and surround her with the people who would eventually show her the way home.
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I really wanted to like this book, but it fell short quite a bit and I honestly wonder why it was turned into a book, because it really feels like a bunch of journal entries.
Firstly, I feel manipulated by the author tying this book so clearly to Lost and getting a bunch of the actors from Lost to promote her book. It was the reason I wanted to check this out, and while I knew it would be a more personal memoir and not Lost-centric, I thought it would atleast have some behind the scenes stuff occasionally. Unfortunately, there is nothing. Instead, she just kept pointing out scenes from Lost that mirrored how she felt. It felt extremely ham-fisted to me.
But on the non-Lost front, I also struggled with this memoir because, while the author is dealing with depression and depression is hard and different for everyone, she does not come across as very likeable at any point (and I say that as someone who was depressed for 10 years) and her reasons for falling into depression-‘I want to be famous and I'm not, instead my husband is'- is just very shallow and her reactions to her kids/husband's behaviors are usually quite rude and self-centered.
The problem is, at the end of the book she reaches some sort of clarity, but it is set 11 years ago. I feel that she could have included some more current insights into why she was acting that way, or how she feels now. Another squandered aspect is that part of her depression is due to the unrealistic criteria put on actresses and the constant doubt and ridicule they are put through, and I think this isn't really dived into but is just briefly mentioned as reasons why she's insecure.
Ultimately, this book was a whole lot of almost interesting. I'd probably have given it 3 stars if it didn't pimp the tenuous Lost connection so hard.
Thanks to Netgalley for the ARC in exchange for an honest review.