Between the ages of 12 and 24, the brain changes in important, and oftentimes maddening and challenging ways. In this book, the author, a psychiatrist busts a number of commonly held myths about adolescence. He shows that, if parents and teens can work together to form a deeper understanding of the brain science behind all the tumult, they will be able to turn conflict into connection and form a deeper understanding of one another. According to the author, during adolescence we learn important skills, such as how to leave home and enter the larger world, how to connect deeply with others, and how to safely experiment and take risks, thereby creating strategies for dealing with the world's increasingly complex problems. Here he presents an inside-out approach to focusing on how brain development affects our behavior and relationships. Drawing on important new research in the field of interpersonal neurobiology, he explores exciting ways in which understanding how the brain functions can improve the lives of adolescents, making their relationships more fulfilling and less lonely and distressing on both sides of the generational divide.
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I skim-read this from about halfway on. It had a little bit of what I was looking for – information on the transformation taking place in the adolescent brain – but also a lot of other stuff, notably ACRONYMS. The author loves them! I'm fine with an acronym or two, but when they're used to the extent that I no longer remember what they mean (what is COAL again?), they lose their usefulness. I would so much prefer him using the actual words.
There was also a lot of space given to mindfulness practices that I think are A. better described elsewhere, B. unlikely to appeal to teens, unless they are a captive audience like his therapy clients, C. generally very heady and cognition-based.
The case studies from his practice were strange, especially one about a sadly alcohol-addicted young woman which ended with giving her advice to go to AA (which she found “dumb”) and the attitude “we'll see what happens to her.” Was there not anything else that could have been done, given that he was treating her from the time of her earlier binge drinking in high school?
Key takeaway in terms of brain development: The adolescent brain has an especially activated dopamine reward system. The troughs are lower (that's why teens so often complain of being bored) and the highs are higher. This means the effects of drugs and alcohol are heightened and are also more appealing. Addiction is also a greater danger the earlier use is started, because the brain gets dependent on the substance to pull it out of painful dopamine lows.
The goal of brain development is integration, the ability to allow different parts to play their appropriate roles without reacting out of chaos or rigidity. Key to developing this are healthy relationships and secure attachments.