More Happy Than Not

I was really worried for the first half of the book. It's a group of teenage boys in the Bronx acting like...well, teen boys. They're super “bro-y”, always talking about sex, which girls are hot, the best blow-jobs they've had, their distaste for common cleanliness courtesies. Obviously it's somewhat exaggerated because it's a YA book, but it is not what I was expecting. I frequently thought “This is not the Adam Silvera content I wanted, give me the GAY!” Once it happened though, it REALLY happened. 0% gay to 100% gay real quick and I loved it.

All of the disparate references to certain events in the book all click together in the final chapters, and it is GUT-WRENCHING. For example, once I realized that Aaron's father killed himself because Aaron finally worked up the courage to come out of the closet, I was an emotional WRECK! I was listening to the audiobook while washing dishes, and immediately started tearing up. The idea of a loved one doing something so terrible to themselves and their family because I disappointed them is something that I feared and struggled with for a long time. I can't imagine what I would do in that situation, and hope I never truly have to reckon with the possibility.