Rogue Protocol

Did not expect this reread to make me think so much about PTSD, but here we are.

The first two novellas in this series primarily explore how past trauma can make you feel agitated and claustrophobic when someone treats you kindly, in contrast to past violence and objectification. Murderbot's hypervigilance based on its past leads to both dissociation via comfort media and skepticism of everyone it comes across.

But in Rogue Protocol, Murderbot finds that these same feelings can get kicked up in the presence of someone else's lack of trauma. Murderbot encounters a bot which considers the humans on its team her friend. Murderbot struggles to wrap its head around this, to fully accept there is no coercion or seedy underbelly lurking. Its kneejerk reaction is to suspect merely a different type of trauma response than its own — oh I see, so you fawn where I flee. However, unlike the sex bot in Artificial Condition, Miki acts of her own volition...kind of, at least. In the way that a child might. An extremely strong and devoted child. But, as Miki says, “I don't have pain sensors, but then, I don't have pain.”

Wells explores trauma and stubborn desires for connection and purpose amidst said trauma in funny but also stirring ways. In each book, Murderbot, despite its best efforts, grows protective over and emotionally attached to others it did not intend to involve itself with, let alone care about. It is, like many of us, a hurt soul nevertheless drawn to protect others from harm. Beneath its surface-level resistance and apathy, it feels awkward and undeserving. Its most tense combats (a competitive category) are with itself.

2019 review:I don't think the plot and pacing are done as well in Rogue Protocol as the first two books. It took a while for anything to really start to happen, and as a result the ending felt a bit rushed to me. I was really interested in Murderbot's reactions to Miki's relationship with Abene and humans in general. I think one of the strengths of this series is its ability to explore themes like authority and consent in a unique context, without spoonfeeding the reader, or sidetracking the story to get preachy. But here it felt too fleeting to deepen or complicate things. And it's not as though there was too much excitement and chaos happening in real time to get touchy-feely; compared to the second and especially first book, this was more description than action.Murderbot is still Murderbot, and I love Murderbot. And, as in [b:Artificial Condition|36223860|Artificial Condition (The Murderbot Diaries, #2)|Martha Wells|https://i.gr-assets.com/images/S/compressed.photo.goodreads.com/books/1505590203l/36223860._SY75_.jpg|56357518], another bot-y character was introduced that I became deeply attached to. This just fell a little flat for me. I'm hoping for more with [b:Exit Strategy|35519109|Exit Strategy (The Murderbot Diaries, #4)|Martha Wells|https://i.gr-assets.com/images/S/compressed.photo.goodreads.com/books/1518642623l/35519109._SY75_.jpg|56934601].