Comprising the classic bestsellers Getting Even, Without Feathers, and Side Effects, this definitive collection of comic writings is from a man who needs no Introduction. Really–this book has no Introduction. The Insanity Defense reveals many sides of Woody Allen as he holds forth on the most human of urges (“Why does man kill? He kills for food. And not only for food: frequently there must be a beverage”); reflects on death (“I don’t believe in an afterlife, although I am bringing a change of underwear”); and notes the effect on history wrought by trick chewing gum, the dribble glass, and other novelties. There is also an inspiring story of the futile race to beat Dr. Heimlich to the punch: “The food went down the wrong pipe, and choking occurred. Grasping the mouse firmly by the tail, I snapped it like a small whip, and the morsel of cheese came loose. If we can transfer the procedure to humans, we may have something. Too early to tell.” All Woody Allen fans will cherish this uproarious treasury–and those who don’t enjoy The Insanity Defense are just plain crazy. “If you don’t care if you break into helpless whoops of laughter on buses, trains, or wherever you happen to be reading it.” –Chicago Tribune, on Without Feathers “Brilliant flights of fancy whose comic detail and inspired silliness are at once dramatic and controlled.” –The New York Times, on Side Effects
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‰ЫПCould Hitler beat Churchill to sideburns? Himmler said Churchill had a head start and that it might be impossible to catch him. Goring, the vacuous optimist, said the Fuhrer could probably grow sideburns quicker, particularly if we marshalled all of Germany‰ЫЄs might in a concentrated effort. Von Rundstedt, at a meeting of the General Staff, said it was a mistake to try to grow sideburns on two fronts at once and advised that it would be wiser to concentrate all efforts on one good sideburn. Hitler said he could do it on both cheeks simultaneously. Rommel agreed with von Rundstedt. ‰ЫчThey will never come out even, mein Fuhrer,‰ЫЄ he said. ‰ЫчNot if you rush them.‰ЫЄ‰Ыќ
