The Nicotine Chronicles

This originally appeared at The Irresponsible Reader.
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I've tried to stop smoking.

I know it's important not to smoke. In fact, it's stupid to smoke. I smoke, but I try not to smoke. Every time I light a cigarette I think, I should not be doing this.

I want a better life. But it's an uphill battle, it is an uphill battle because I try to do the right thing, but I don't do the right thing. And...I smoke anyway.

Fuck it, I don't smoke that much. The chances that something really bad will happen to me as a consequence of my smoking habit are slim. In fact, the chances that something else might happen to me for other reasons are far greater. Something will happen to me, though.

Sooner or later. That's guaranteed.

THE NICOTINE CHRONICLES

THE NICOTINE CHRONICLES

I craved a cigarette right then like I was missing not some foreign chemical but a part of my own, soul, and from each cell of my throat and my lungs, I thanked the universe that I had one.