The Wounded Healer

Reviews and more on my blog: Entering the Enchanted Castle

I wanted to read this because I'm personally interested in the theme of the wounded healer. I've been severely burnt by the attitudes and practices of people in positions of leadership and authority, who have not addressed their own wounds and become hurtful rather than helpful. They may want to be healers, or believe they are, but they just make things worse, or most often cover up and mask the underlying issues while failing to take any responsibility for the results. I definitely don't want to do this myself, so I need guidance about how to avoid that trap.

I found Nouwen's perspective helpful, especially the last chapter. He points out that it's a false goal to promise wholeness and immortality. What the wounded healer can offer is “hospitality,” a safe space for the other to unfold his or her own soul, and to share the suffering that is the common ground of our human condition. When suffering is shared in this way, recognized and held in a compassionate consciousness, it becomes a path to liberation.

I think this is an extremely important and profound point. Any relationship, any faith, or any political regime or movement, that promises to remove all our pain and make everything great again, should be suspect. Nouwen believes that the loneliness which is our deepest human wound is also, viewed from a true Christian perspective, our greatest gift. The paradoxical mystery of the Christian path is to share this loneliness and make it into a way forward, rather than a dead stop.

I know already of many places in my own life where I can try to practice this, and see for myself whether it does indeed lead forward into paths of liberation. Thanks to Nouwen for pointing the way.