This is not a test

The thing no one tells you about surviving, about the mere act of holding out, is how many hours are nothing because nothing happens. They also don't tell you about how you can share your deepest secrets with someone, kiss them, and the next hour it's like there's nothing between you because not everything can mean something all the time or you'd be crushed under the weight of it.

courtney summers has been my favorite author since i was 12 and i waited a super long time to read this but god she just always knocks it out of the park. she makes me feel crazy with how much i love the way she writes and the stories she's able to tell, but most of all i love her protagonists and how terrible and selfish and broken they can be. she's always had this ability to tap into the darkest parts of being a teen girl so well it blows my mind still. this might be one of her darkest works, but at the end it's all still so human...