A Monster Calls

Oh, dear... I was bawling my eyes out, and my sweet husband said “I don't think I want you to read that book...” Oh, yes, I might have not wanted to read it had I known what it was, but all I knew about it was the movie trailer, and that looked really interesting. This story was interesting, but it wasn't what the movie trailer made me think it was.

Trigger warning for bullying.

Anyway... my father died of cancer. It was the most painful, humiliating, debilitating, torturing death I can think of, and my father, my dearest, wonderful, amazing father didn't do anything to deserve that. Now, I can't think of anyone who deserves a death like that, but... my father wanted to live so badly. There were still so many things he wanted to do and experience and learn, still so many years he should have lived. And I wanted him in my life very badly, too. And my mother, my siblings, even my inlaws, everyone who knew him wanted him in their lives very badly. Nevertheless, I was praying for him to let go of life and die, in the last hours of his life. Death is not the worst thing that can happen to a person.

I love you, dad.

Fuck cancer.