Erotic Stories for Punjabi Widows

I loved this book! There is so much to discuss in book club next week! From themes around tradition and expectations versus freedom and new ideas, to women owning their lives and having a say in the direction it takes, to forgiveness, and more. If you are looking for a great read about a culture you may or may not know a lot about, this is a great choice!

I received this book for free as a member of the Book Club Girl Book Club from Harper Collins, and it was a great read.

Something definitely different from my usual books. I loved the stories mixed through out but I enjoyed most the people and their interactions and a view into a culture I didn't grow up in.

My favorite lines “Let him find balance and moderation in all things. Let him listen to himself, and not the noise of others.”

I really expected to love this book. I loved the concept.

I believe a group of marginalized women could get together, and in admitting their sexual beings with desires and fantasies, start a journey toward liberation.

The problem is that it wasn't presented as a journey. The women shared the stories without hesitation and then everything was good.

Two women don't care for each other much, and then they do. One of these women has an issue with the nature of the class ... and then she doesn't.

A couple is not close, and then they have a night of better sex, and their marriage is fixed.

I had trouble finding satisfaction in the book, because there always seemed to be a needed step or scene missing in order for any plot line to resonate or for me to feel like the various resolutions were earned.

We're told how dangerous it is for these women to share their stories, but that never comes to fruition. The danger in the book is over something else entirely, only joined with this main plot by a general misogynistic umbrella.

I noticed multiple editorial errors such as missing words.

The biggest issue is that a contradictory information about a necklace worn by a character. She says the necklace belonged to a female friend who died, and was given to her by the friend's mother, and since that day (that her friend died and her friend's mother gave her the necklace) she has worn it every day.

Just a few pages later she says:

I didn???t have an ounce of sympathy for him. At his funeral, I wore Gulshan???s necklace for the first time. People stared but they said nothing. They all knew.???

This is not the author's fault. Things change in between drafts, and it's hard to keep track. That's why there are editors. Still, moments like that took me out of the book.

I hope to read more by this author.

When I first heard the title of this book last year, I was actually quite taken aback and didn't really plan on reading it. Then the reviews started coming and they were surprisingly very positive and this kept the book on my radar. I've been having a bad week, so I decided to pick this up because nothing cures a reading slump better than a book with desi characters - the familiarity is just very comforting. And wow was this an interesting read - it's fun and relatable and ohhh so hilarious while also discussing some very deep topics.

Nikki can feel like a difficult protagonist to like, especially because she is very judgey of others - her mother for being oppressive, her sister for choosing an arranged marriage and the women in her class for being too traditional and wanting to keep the honor of their late husbands. However, she is struggling with herself too, trying to choose a middle ground between wanting to satisfy her parents wishes and finding her passion and following through on it. She also has to reconcile her family's traditional values with her feminist beliefs and it's not an easy position to be in. And that's what made Nikki so relatable to me because I totally understood where she was coming from. As the book goes on, she tries to understand more of where the other women are coming from too and becomes more emphathetic towards them and I liked seeing that growth. 

We only get one other POV, Kulwinder who is the Community Director who wants the women to have something to do in the classes and probably learn how to write, but she is mostly just trying to deal with the loss of her only daughter, especially not knowing why she committed suicide and being too scared to investigate it. The women in the class are also an eclectic bunch - strong and lively and fun, who have been forgotten by the society but want to live atleast some part of their life on their own terms - I just loved all of them and they all had something to say and Nikki really grows because of her association with them.

I absolutely loved the writing in this book. The author brings the Punjabi community in Southall to life and also the little misogynistic things we all get used to growing up because we consider it our culture, how the word “honor” is used to brush things under the carpet and women are oppressed and not allowed to express themselves. And it was really so interesting to watch the widows - who are probably the most forgotten and not really considered at all - decide to express their desires and fantasies through stories, things they probably kept repressed in their hearts till now, and how much joy this freedom gives them. Their stories were very erotic, quite imaginative and some very surprising too. But the highlight was when the ladies were discussing these stories - they are so laugh out funny that I was guffawing most of the time. The author uses these stories and the women's own experiences to give us a tale about women finding their own voice in a society that doesn't want them to have one and finally feeling empowered enough to want everyone to hear it. The author also manages to sneak in a subplot about a murder and even though it's not a major part of the book, there is always a sinister undercurrent which I really enjoyed.

This was such such an entertaining read while also being really thought provoking and it was masterful of the author to strike the perfect balance. I definitely recommend this to anyone who likes reading quirky contemporaries and even if you don't like erotica, you can always skip the stories. And all you desi readers beware..... because you will never look at ghee the same ever again !!!!!