The Best We Could Do

I am not ashamed to admit that I cried really hard near the end of this book.

I remember sitting down with a friend years ago, listening while he told me the story of his family escaping Vietnam. How, even as adult, it felt unreal to hear someone I knew so well and seemed so like me could have had a childhood that was so mired in fear and death. It was the first time, despite having grown up with so many Vietnamese friends, that I had really thought about what life was like in Vietnam in the 70s.

This book is full of history. It's so full of everything. The art was so beautiful and expressive. I love the cover. I think what first drew me to the book was the cover. Vietnam on one side, the US on the other. Though very much a book about the history of Vietnam and the fall of Saigon and her family's experience, it is also a book about what it means to be a mother. And I do think that it most clearly comes to you when you become a parent yourself. Everything your parents did for you, all the things they gave up so you could thrive. I found it especially poignant when Hang tells Thi's husband she was happiest when she was at the school before college, before her husband, before children. Thi is somewhat upset that her mother didn't think of herself as happiest with her children, but I understood that. Before you become a mother your happiness is tied to no one else. You are living for yourself, following your dreams. Once you have children you find joy in them, you are happy when you see them, smell them, you love them. But your happiness is different. It is not your own anymore.